8 Tips for Handling the Meeting Monopolizer

Help! Someone has hijacked your meeting!

You did everything right: A well-crafted agenda … a carefully considered invite list … you started right on time ….  And now, one of the meeting participants is off on a wild tangent, repeating his point over and over and over, with no signs of slowing (or stopping for a breath).

As the meeting facilitator, how can you tactfully regain control and get things back on track, before everyone else in the room/Zoom® loses interest or your meeting runs long? Because allowing a talker free reign will cause your quieter meeting members to get discouraged or annoyed.
 

Here are suggestions from several experts:

1. Address the meeting monopolizer head on. 

   Say something like, “Let’s table that for now and move on with our agenda,” or “I’m looking for quick input at this stage, but might come back to you on this down the road,” suggests quickbase.com. (If he or she ignores your comments, do stop him again.) “Jim, your comments are always helpful, but I want to make sure everyone has a chance to share their ideas. Tammy, how do you feel we should address this change?” If your moderation still doesn’t work (and if the meeting is in person), stand up, walk over and stand behind the person, repeating your request.

2. Interrupt the meeting monopolizer. 

   When the person does take a breath, break in. You can ask for clarification of a major point, suggests selfgrowth.com, or shift the focus by specifically asking someone else for their thoughts on the topic.

3. Listen and praise the monopolizer's initial remarks. 

   Sometimes simply acknowledging his or her contributions is enough to make the person feel heard and satisfied. “Jim, I really liked your suggestion regarding our vendor list—nice idea. Now, let’s move on to the third item on our agenda.” (Say these two sentences without a breath between them so your monopolizer can’t interject before you move on.)

4. Set the tone early. 

   If your monopolizer has a history of over-talking, you’ve got a leg up. Start your meeting by explaining that you’ll be asking for input by going quickly from person to person (If anyone doesn’t have input, they are free to pass). Get agreement on a time limit (Suggest one minute.). Setting these ground rules up front will also hopefully get those less-inclined to speak up, more involved.

5. If the monopolizer cuts in on someone else, stop them. 

   “Hang on a minute Jim. I’d like to hear the rest of what Max had to say.”

6. Try joking about the monopolizing.

   Renee Evenson’s book Powerful Phrases for Dealing with Difficult People suggest saying something like: “Jim, it’s time to come up for air and let someone else talk. From now on twenty words or less!”

7. Remind the group periodically of the remaining time. 

   People will usually appreciate it if you frame your interruption as a desire to move on and finish at the designated time.

8. Speak to the person privately. 

   If this is a recurring meeting and your monopolizer isn’t getting the message, draw them aside before hand and enlist their help in getting wider participation from the group. Try asking: “How do you think we could draw out the quieter members of the group?”
    

Further develop your assertiveness skills when you register for: Building Confidence & Assertiveness Skills at Work.

When you facilitate a meeting, you cannot allow one person to take over the discussion. Remember that it’s your job to make sure the meeting is productive. By design, meetings should encourage input from every participant (because if you’re not looking for a participant’s input, you probably wouldn’t have included them). But it’s up to you to hold that line — drawing out hesitant participants, tactfully shutting down meeting monopolizers and respecting everyone’s time. Be known for your ability to hold a well-organized, on-topic meeting; your meetings will be more productive and your team will respect you for it.