Does Subtle Gender-based Discrimination Rob Women of Power?

In the wake of #MeToo, if we didn’t know before, we now know that sexual harassment is illegal.

But sexual harassment doesn’t have to be of the overtly sexual nature making headlines. In fact, the most common type of gender-based harassment is not aimed at sexual coercion at all, according to Anna Redmond for entreprenure.com. And, the U.S. Equal Employment Opportunity Commission (EEOC) reminds us that harassment can simply be offensive remarks about a person’s sex—comments often playing into the negative gender stereotypes about how men and women should or do act.

But, according to the EEOC, these comments are only illegal if “they’re frequent, severe or create a hostile or offensive work environment or one that results in an adverse employment decision. The law doesn’t prohibit simple teasing, offhand comments, or isolated incidents that are not very serious.”

So, should we all just toughen up?

Redmond’s article describes a workplace incident where a male colleague comments on the face she’s making while giving her impassioned defense of a candidate in a competition she was helping judge, implying that she wasn’t looking pretty and pleasant. Condescending, humiliating and rude comments as well as ostracizing acts obviously have nothing to do with sex or overt discrimination. Quite the contrary.  

Does this incivility cause self-doubt (or just annoyance)?

Could it, over time, make someone quit a job or change careers?

It probably depends on the person.

Here’s another subtle example to mull over:

A young female chemical engineer takes a job in the oil and gas industry. After a year with this organization, every engineer is assigned time in the field on a pipeline dig. Prior to her assignment, her male supervisor calls her into his office and tells her she won’t be going into the field. He explains that the work is hot and dirty (“she probably wouldn’t like that”) and that he doesn’t think the crew (all male) will like being “bossed around by a woman.” He jokingly adds that he hopes he doesn’t “sound sexist.” Good naturedly, she agrees. 

Is this well-meaning chivalry illegal?

Probably not. Because it’s an isolated incident. And the young woman’s agreement signals that this “special” treatment is welcome.

Will it effect this woman’s future?

Maybe. Down the line when she is vying for a management position and all her male competitors have field experience, will it be a differentiator?

Gender-based harassment is illegal.

And when there’s repeated verbal abuse, work sabotage and/or humiliation and intimidation, it’s relatively easy to determine that you’re dealing with actionable, gender-based harassment. But what about cases of bullying and the even more subtle interactions where the treatment and comments are seemingly well intentioned?

As more and more women enter male-dominated fields and rise to leadership roles, subtle discrimination can rob women of power. We must learn to assess and draw the line by speaking up.

Have you experienced a similar scenario? We’d love to have you share your thoughts.